Regarding Super Bowl LIII last night it’s hard to say what was more uneventful – the football game itself which only took one touchdown for the Patriots to win, or the halftime show which gave SpongeBob SquarePants about the same length of stage time as Travis Scott. For those who don’t know, SpongeBob’s appearance in the halftime show was a tribute to the show’s creator Stephen Hillenburg who passed away last year after battling ALS, and a performance featuring just Travis Scott and SpongeBob would have been a Super Bowl show worth watching.
Unfortunately, though, all we got was roughly a combined 3 minutes of the two and then 13 minutes of Maroon 5 featuring stunning performances from Adam Levine’s nipples, and honestly the only thing that got me through the show was how much everyone was roasting it (mostly Maroon 5) on twitter.
Maroon 5: “If you’re listening to us, you’ve given up”
— who pixelates the boatmen? (@pixelatedboat) February 4, 2019
Super Bowl halftime nipple rules feel inconsistent
— Katie Nolan (@katienolan) February 4, 2019
adam levine is like the first draft of anthony kiedis
— taylor garron (@casualafro) February 4, 2019
Stunning score at halftime:
— Ben Rosen (@ben_rosen) February 4, 2019
the hard cuts from spongebob to sicko mode to she will be loved to I love the way you move is going to give me an aneurism
— gracie hoos (@cottoncandaddy) February 4, 2019
Adam Levine should have removed his skin and muscles and ended the show with his skeleton exposed
— Tamara Yajia (Babe Vigoda) (@DancesWithTamis) February 4, 2019
Imagine paying $3,000+ for a Maroon 5 concert and a field goal.
— Audrey Martin (@iamaudiemartin) February 4, 2019
Personally, I won’t make fun of Adam Levine for his tattoos.
It’s his body and I respect his right to do whatever he wants with it.
I will make fun of him for being in Maroon 5 because that affects all of us.
— MehGyver (@AndrewNadeau0) February 4, 2019
Maroon 5 and Tom Brady both entered the national consciousness in 2001, and we have been coping with the desecration of this country ever since.
— Sean Fennessey (@SeanFennessey) February 4, 2019
I’ve spoken with Satan and We’re excited to announce a new feature in Hell: endless streaming of Maroon 5 live performances
— Jesus Christ (@SonOfGodAndMan) February 4, 2019