Les Grossman Destroys Hans Gruber In This Mash-Up


A tense negotiation gets even more tenserer when Tropic Thunder’s Rick Peck (Matthew McConaughey) hits a bit of a speed bump in his talks with Hans Gruber (Alan Rickman) from Die Hard. Fear not, that’s when infamous supermogul Les Grossman (Tom Cruise) steps up to the plate for a bases loaded grandslam of a burn.

Hans Gruber doesn’t go down without a little bit of polite posturing though. That’s when Les Grossman brings in the pièce-de-résistance: dick cheese. A phrase that combines two things that really should never go together, much like “cow bikini” or “chicken sashimi.”

The worst part is that everyone on any kind of wireless communication device, across time, space, and celluloid, hears the epic burn.


FIELD NOTES FROM THE FUNNY OR DIE STAFF

Les Grossman might be my favorite Tom Cruise role, because the combination of his physical grotesqueness, his posturing as the epitome of virile masculinity, and his king of the jungle, everybody just wants to get rich or fuck hubris used in this parody form within Tropic Thunder CRUUUUSSHHHHES.

He’s only on screen for a small time, but this character made a big impact. So big in fact that people have acknowledged the ten-year anniversary of Les Grossman’s appearance in the film Tropic Thunder, and the genesis of this character has its own lore, too.

 

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